February 7, 2009

Tess wrote these words to me, and I am so grateful, I'll explain in a bit:

"Years ago, I read Deepak Chopra's book, "The Seven Spritual Laws of Success" and I recall he said that once we set our intention for what we want out into the world, we have to then let go of our attachment to its outcome. If we focus too much, then it becomes a tug-o-war, and it's stressful on us. So, while you're crafting your letter and walking the line you feel you're walking, between support and annoyance, FEEL your EMOTION like you evoked in us in your last email pertaining to your recently received Q. See and feel the end result you want, whether or not the words are written on the paper. Your message gets to all of them anyway. Then, let go of your attachment to their particular situation with regard to MPM --- let God and the Universe then do the work. F/U, sure. Answer queries, sure. Support the food pantry, sure. Grow your team, sure. Find others to support along the way, sure. But in your heart, know that you're trusting the outcome for Mike and Betsy, and for everyone there helping them and themselves, but that the outcome may not be in your own timing, but rather, in Divine timing."

About eleven years ago, when it became apparent that we would have to move to southern Maine, I went through a similar experience. Trying to choreograph every last detail of this life changing move was extremely stressful. My job at the time involved traveling and long hours. I came home at the end of each day mentally and physically exhausted.
I remember saying to Jim "I just want a slow, porch swing life." He was calm as usual, unfazed by the daunting changes about to occur. That Mother's Day, he gave me a gift that I still treasure. He found an print by Edward Gordon, an artist we both loved, called Porch Swing. He said to focus on this and let go of the outcome. We would be ok.

Even though we were going from two incomes to one, 3 children and a fourth on the way, I followed his advice. I would lose myself in the print, imagining how it felt to be there, carefree.

When I let go of the outcome, and let things unfold, beautiful, unexpected things happened. We built our dream house in a wonderful neighborhood - with a porch swing!
It's still my favorite place in the world to be. Jim and I sit out there evenings and watch the kids play and wave to neighbors.

As I look back, and go over the details of that time now in my head, I know it shouldn't have worked out as it did. On paper, things just didn't add up. But somehow, the pieces came together.

As we come to the end of the bootcamp, I am going to take Tess' advice and let go of the outcome. I will still do what's necessary to set things in motion, but I will not try to control the end results. I realize that by doing that, I am limiting what could be.
I have a new focal point now, an impressionist print of a summer villa in Tuscany that hangs in our family room. I was drawn to it a few years ago, and would love to visit some day. Today, I will start to lose myself in this new place, imagining how it would feel to be there in person.
Thanks Tess!